The effects of stress on the mind and body.  An interview with Psychologist Keeley Tavener of Key for Change

This week we talk about the effects of stress on the mind and body this is part four.

I’ve always been interested in the impact that stress has on the mind and body, so I asked my friend Keeley Tavener, and she agreed to chat with me on Zoom to discuss the subject.

So I thought I would transcribe an abridged version of the video an interview with Psychologist Keeley Tavener of Key for Change.  As an easy read. 

If you would like to watch the complete YouTube video, please click here

Keeley is an author

I ask Keeley if she has written a book, and Keeley replies that she is forever writing books and trying to reach people. 

She says “You know I think for me, I am a grassroots girl, and I want to help people across the board in as many ways as I can.  So I’ll use video, I write blogs, I have a blog out every week on my website.  I also have workbooks.  My current workbooks are about being an Empath,  how to help empathic people look after themselves because empaths are notoriously bad at putting themselves first.”

I agree with Keeley and say “Entirely me, I know, I know, I’m always trying to fix things.” because as an Empath that’s exactly what happens.

Keeley agrees with me and then says “And yet there’s a level of self-neglect. And I think what makes me different as a Psychotherapist is I’m unashamed about talking about my own battles, to demonstrate to people that change is possible.”

We’re all connected

I agree with Keeley and Keeley continues “You may view me as someone who has it all sorted, and I don’t, but I know enough that I know I’m on the right path and I know that life would challenge all of us and we’re all in this together.”

I agree with Keeley and say “Yeah, we’re all connected.”

Keeley agrees and says “Exactly. We really are, and that’s the tragedy, I think of the medical model, that things are dealt with in isolation.  Your physical symptoms are dealt with in isolation.”

The body is a truth-teller

Keeley continues “Just thinking about stress as well, another one that’s come up is eczema is another one that comes up in terms of people having flare-ups, on their skin, which is another way that, you know, the body keeps the score.  The body is a truth-teller.”

I agreed with Keeley and said “Yeah, it definitely keeps the score, doesn’t it.

Keeley continued “yeah, it tells the truth, so for so many of us, it’s a bit like today, I was being good, and instead of having a coffee in the morning, I had a mint tea, because I just, I ate late last night and I stopped before I just went into robot behaviour, and I thought what does my body need, and I thought, I can eat mint tea, sometimes it’s about paying attention.”

Keeley continued, “I’ve over-eaten for years, I was an obese child, and today I was eating breakfast and felt full, and it’s all of those factors, isn’t it? It’s a bit like my cousin, and I had a McDonalds last night and a part of me was like, I don’t think I really wanted it, but there’s that mutualness about we both eat together, so I kind of eat and go against a part of me, it’s like you don’t actually want to.”

Keeley continues “ So I always love to sort of notice life and how life shows up and by no means are any of us perfect, but what I am very good at doing is then starting to document that, because I know what’s personal is often universal, that we often battle by ourselves thinking it’s just me and in actual fact, so many of us  have got the same challenges, but are silenced because we think it’s just us.”

Social Media

I agree with Keeley and say “Which is the joy of Social Media, isn’t it? Because you can get to find other groups that you can kind of talk to as well.”

Keeley replies “Yeah and maybe, maybe for us as mature adults, it is, but obviously, as a mother of to a 19-year-old and a 22-year-old, I think, you’ve got that balance.  But I also think for a lot of adults; they are also using it for, you know, they have to be careful, we have to be very, there’s a lot of choice there.”

I couldn’t agree more with Keeley, and say you have to take Social media with a pinch of salt and that for me Social media is a source of entertainment.

Keeley has a WhatsApp self-care checklist

Keeley replies “As a practitioner who is informed by people, just as you know, I’ve done a WhatsApp anxiety self-care checklist.  Because WhatsApp kept coming up in therapy for loads of clients of all different backgrounds because they’re in family groups that are stressing them out, friendship groups where they’re being ignored, or subtle bullying has taken place, and if that’s been in someone’s history from before, it shows up.”

Which is something that I never had thought of and then realised that you have to careful using Social Media.

Keeley continues “Yeah, I think it’s like anything in life, everything has the capacity for good, and it has the capacity to be problematic.”

I couldn’t have agreed with Keeley more and then what seemed like a moment, and it was time it ‘wrap it up.’

Thank you Keeley for an amazing interview.

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